Am I a Bully?

These questions are designed to stimulate thought processing, questions, open discussions, and assist the reader with enhancing their self-insight. Do you have any concerns regarding your actions, reactions, and behaviors? Do you worry you may be a bully? Keep and open mind and review each question carefully. Take time to process these difficult questions. You could also ask people you trust, for feedback. Awareness and personal growth are essential to developing strong leadership skills and healthy relationships It is very important to have a cohesive leadership team, and this sets the tone for a healthy work culture. No matter what you discover, negative or disruptive behaviors are not hard wired. With our help, you can make positive changes.

  • Do you yell, raise your voice, or swear at your staff or colleagues? Often?
  • Are you able to apologize (authentic & accountable) and correct/learn from this behaviour?
  • Do you expect your staff to be accountable and then avoid being accountable yourself?
  • Do you ignore, dismiss, or exclude a staff or staff members?
  • Do you abuse your staff with insults – stated or implied? Do you talk negatively about your staff behind their backs?
  • Do you have favorite staff members and make this obvious to others?
  • Have people complained about you? Are complaints showing a pattern?
  • Does your staff walk on eggshells around you? Are you all right with this?
  • Does your staff respond confidently to you? Are they free to act like themselves with you? Are some of them quiet or closed in meetings? Do you prefer it this way?
  • Do you ‘win’ discussions with statements like: “I’m the boss”, “I’m the owner”, or “I am the expert around here”.
  • Have you ever received feedback stating that communicate in passive aggressive ways?
  • Is your most often used management tool to i.e.: threaten? Intimidate? Or use subtle acts of oppression?
  • Do staff members make complaints about you? Is there any consistency in complaints or themes? Do you want to make things better for them? Do you care about the impact of your behaviour on other staff, work environment, or clients?
  • Are you transparent in your leadership and decisions? If not, why not?
  • If someone rubs you the wrong way, questions you or disagrees with you, do you feel resentful and plan to get even?
  • Do you “feel the need” to control your staff?
  • Do you often feel inadequate? Are you threatened when staff have answers that you don’t? Do you feel threatened when your staff show more skill in some areas?
  • Are you part of a clique that dismisses or avoids others? Are you willing to invite others in occasionally? Is there safety in your clique? Do you tell your staff, or colleagues that others are talking about them? Do you tell staff that others don’t like them?

If you wish to process this further with an objective professional, call for a confidential supportive consultation.

©L. Crockett. 2013